Stress of Moving

I've moved house a number of times as an adult.  As a child I had one family home which we kept my whole life, we briefly had a second home in another area of the country for work purposes, but this was only for a few years and it was never our permanent base.  When my other half moved in with me I had been living in my apartment for only a couple of months, I fully intended to stay there for a good few years however it was really only a place for one person.  It was a two bed apartment but it just didn't fit our needs as a couple, so after we got engaged (4 years ago) we decided to buy.  

We bought a lovely house which I still adore, in a beautiful area right by a country park (which I equally still adore).  We had a new bathroom fitted, we redecorated, made the garden look lovely and made it our home.  Special highlights included being the first people into the country park after heavy snowfall, running through so much fresh snow when everything was still blue! Living near the coast for 4 years has also been a real treat for me and I will really miss it.  But we're ready to move on, to a new area of the country with more culture, more to do, yet still beautiful country parks around (but sadly no coast!). If I could pick our house up and move it to the new area I really would!  But I can't and we've found a lovely new home, slightly smaller than we have now, but its really gorgeous and we're thrilled about it.  

So, whats the catch? In honestly, the answer is actually moving! I've never found it stressful before, even when we moved from the apartment together it just wasn't difficult - yet this time it really feels like it is! We've got a lot of stuff, so much so that we've even been doing car boot sales (which are surprisingly lucrative).  But I can already feel myself getting anxious about packing, what should stay what should go...should we get new furniture, will this fit?  I always remember being told that 3 of the most stressful things in life are getting married (wasn't stressful it was exciting!), getting divorced (hoping this won't be something I have to go through!) and moving house (which I always thought of as an adventure previously).  

Hopefully this will be the last big move for a number of years as we've really fallen in love with the area! Fingers crossed my applications for med school agree with my new found love and let me stay there! My other half will be a student for the next 3 years and I'm doing my MSc next year, but if I'm lucky enough to get into med school it would be so lovely to not have to move again! But whatever will be will be, I will be grateful to get into med school anywhere!  

I shall report on the house-move progress as the packing progresses...for now its time to quickly hoover as we have a viewing this afternoon, fingers crossed!!!! 

Personal Statement

So as you know I am a mature student.  I've written personal statements before, in fact I used to help my friends write them when we were in 6th form, yet I can't seem to write mine for my medicine application.  I don't understand what is wrong with me, I have written everything out in bullet points, I know what I want to say but it just doesn't feel strong enough!  I have no idea what is missing from it, but I know I need to get it finished by next week to send to my tutor who is going to be writing my reference.  I don't know what is wrong with me, this is the most important thing I'm ever going to write and I can't seem to get it sorted.  

I have work experience all next week and then the GAMSAT next Friday so I really have to get it sorted this weekend, why does this seem so impossible?  I think it is because I've been planning it for over 2 years now that I just want it to be perfect, when truthfully nothing ever is.  I want to study medicine, I'd love to study next year, but I know it is unlikely.  I'll be happy to do my MSc, but I don't want to not get an interview because I've not produced a strong enough Personal Statement!!!  

I can write blog posts with ease, I talk comfortably, I can even write essays with very little difficulty, yet a statement telling admissions tutor why I'm a good candidate to study medicine is really scary! I'm positive I'm not the only one who feels this way, I just know that the competition for places will just be so intense and I want to make my application stand out more than anything!

Anyway, I'm going to go and sit and make some more notes and hope a draft magically appears!  

Planning

It seems that my life revolves around planning at the moment, booking my UKCAT, planning open days, sorting out my revision schedule for the summer, figuring out my dissertation topic, all requiring lots of planning.  I don't seem to have much time to do anything between volunteering and working towards the summer exams and next year!  I don't mind because I know that it'll (hopefully) be worth it in the end, but it would be nice to have a little bit of "me" time without feeling guilty and thinking that I should be doing something else instead. 

I'm sitting here waiting for my dad to call me so that I can go and pick up something from him, wishing he'd hurry up as I'm wasting time that I should be spending reading for my dissertation so I can send my proposal to my lecturer and have a supervisor assigned to me.  I still can't believe that in September I'll be in my 3rd year, this degree has flown by.  I've really enjoyed it, I wish I hadn't had the health problems I've had with it but I'm pretty proud of myself for being able to continue with it despite them.  

I think today I'm going to meet my dad, finish doing some reading, write a draft proposal, do a spot of note making for my exams and then catch up on some other work. My other half has plans this evening and I'm going too, so I'll probably be shattered by about 9pm, just in time for 24 hours in A and E.  Frustratingly I wake up pretty early most days and I'm shattered pretty early in the evening too, which also makes me feel guilty and feel like I should be working rather than crashed out on the sofa.  

Anyway, my dad has just called and told me he's not meeting me for over an hour so I'm going to get back to my reading.  Hope everyone has at least had the chance to enjoy some of the lovely sunshine we've had, fingers crossed that wasn't our summer.  

April Cinema

I spent the day with my other half today, working this morning and then we popped to the cinema to see 'The Cabin in the Woods'. 

We also saw 'The Hunger Games' last night, so I guess if you're a film fan this might help you choose between them (or encourage you to see one or neither of them, I'm not sure). Lets start with 'The Hunger Games'.  This was fantastic, I absolutely loved it, was mildly irritated by a couple of things, it is a little 'Hollywood' in some respects, but I really did enjoy it; I hear it is a trilogy so I'm really looking forward to seeing the next two movies!  Usually I read the books before the films come out, but I was really keen to enjoy this for what it was, I have seen the play and read the novel for 'The Woman in Black' and I spent the whole film trying to second guess what was coming next, I was also a little irritated by the fact that it was so different from the novel and so I decided I would read the book after seeing the film.  

Now onto 'The Cabin in The Woods'.  I should point out I'm quite a big film fan, I love horror, thriller type films, but I am a HUGE wuss, if I'm scared, I hide.  I hid for a relatively large part of this film.  If you watch the trailer, you would be forgiven for thinking that you're going to see a combination of 'Hostel' and 'The Hills Have Eyes', it is more than that, in some ways and in others not quite as graphic or tense. I really enjoyed it however; it frightened me, it was on quite a few different levels, literally, and had an ending I really didn't expect, but I perhaps would have altered the ending slightly again, but it was completely worth the ticket, which after seeing 'The Devil Inside Me' was a welcome relief.  (Do not waste your money on 'The Devil Inside Me', the film was finally getting going and then it ends, awful film, complete waste of money and time!)

Now I'm going to revise Osteoporosis, a bit of a change from watching scary movies, but necessary I believe if I want to pass my exams next month. If you have any films you think I should see, please feel free to let me know - I'm always happy to watch new films! 

Medical School Panic

So, in one month I'll be finishing my 2nd year.  Excellent and I'm finally healthy enough and my ankle seems stable enough (touch wood!) to begin my volunteering, which is amazing.  I also have the shadowing sorted for the summer, alongside the project I've been working on which has been amazing, but I can't help feeling my application isn't going to be strong enough for this year.  I did a practice UKCAT test yesterday for the first time (I didn't even know what was involved) and it was ok I suppose for a first attempt, aside from the numerical section which was absolutely appalling, which does not bode well for me at all.  I really didn't want to rely on the GAMSAT too much as it is such a beast I wanted 2 UKCAT Unis and 2 GAMSAT Unis and now I'm worried that I'm going to have to go for 4 GAMSAT unis.  

I have absolutely no idea how this is all going to pan out, I had everything planned to the nth degree and then I messed it all up by getting injured.  Completely my fault, but it isn't going to make me feel great when I have to take yet another year to apply again if I don't get in this time.  I'm a mature student (I'm still the right side of 30 but still!) and I just feel frustrated. I'm seeing on forums that people who are quite honestly fantastic candidates getting rejected from all 4 choices, even with high scores, high academic grades etc. 

If people who are:
a) Younger than me
b) Have better academic credentials than me
c) Have higher GAMSAT/UKCAT scores than I can ever hope for
d) Have more voluntary work experience than me
Aren't getting offers, what am I supposed to do?  I just hope that I get one offer, I don't mind where, I really truly don't, I'll be happy with any of the 6 places I want to apply to (I haven't narrowed it down yet, open day season is upon us!) were kind enough to offer me a place I'd be over the moon.  I can't quite get my head around people being offered places and then saying that they're not sure they're going to take them as it wasn't their "first choice"... *DON'T APPLY TO A UNI UNLESS YOU'RE HAPPY TO TAKE THE PLACE*. 

Anyway, I'm going to stop ranting, just having a moment of complete and utter blind panic! I'm going to go and revise, because one thing is for sure, I'm not going anywhere unless I pass my degree!  Thanks for reading.  

Dentists

I have to go to the dentist today...I HATE going to the dentist with a passion.  No particular reason why, apart from having two horrible experiences with wisdom teeth (doesn't everyone?) it isn't the pain I'm ever concerned about, its the noise.  Fillings literally fill me with panic, and fear, and stress, I have no idea why I just REALLY hate it. I haven't been for a while so today will just be a check up, I'm not having any fillings or anything as I have work to do today so the last thing I need is numbness. 

I also have an equally painful appointment just before the dentist at the car garage.  I have to have two new tyres, which will cost me a ridiculous amount of money for what feels like nothing exciting at all.  The joys of car ownership!

I shouldn't complain though it is beautiful and sunny outside, I shall be finishing off my report in the sunshine later, probably having a late night because knowing me I'll rip it all to bits about 20 times and then wish that I'd gone with my first draft because I'm useless like that!  The plus side is that my better half has two weeks off starting on Friday and I only have one more essay to hand in before exam time, can't believe I'm nearly at the end of my 2nd year, it really really has flown by!  Hopeful I'll get through the year with a 2:1! 

Have a good day everyone - enjoy the sunshine, this may well be our summer!  

Volunteering and Work Experience

Because of my ankle this year has been awful in terms of work experience and volunteering.  I've had to delay everything until I could walk and until I was feeling better, but that means that aside from the work I've been doing since last year, I don't have anything else....yet.  I've got lots lined up for the summer, but still, others on my course have way more than me and I'm really concerned that thanks to my ankle I've messed up any chance I have of going to med school in 2013.  This really worries me as a mature student I don't want to waste anymore time I really want to get on with it. 

I'm hopeful that the work I'll be doing will be sufficient as I'll have plenty of interesting experiences to talk about at interview (if I ever get one!) but its the worry that I think my friends who are all doing fantastic things have more...

I'm hopeful it is quality over quantity, and I'll have 7 months solid worth of work experience when I finish my UCAS application, so that should be ok.  I really hope it will be! 

Anyway, enough stressing, I have a lab report to do!